How the World Receives Differences

Before my burn incident I feel like for the most part I went unnoticed. I could go anywhere and wear anything and the world would keep on spinning. When I began to step out as a burn survivor, my eyes were open to a whole new dimension. My world was now split into those who admired my braveness and those who felt disgust by it. You could see the empathy in the faces of those who were, and you could not miss the sneer from the others. My scars ran from my back to my ankles so covering them up around the clock in sunny South Florida would be suicide. I had no issue with my scars, so I dressed appropriate for season. The level of discomfort that was now imposed on me was something I never wished for anyone to bare. Yet many others did!

I was twenty-two years old when I suffered second- and third-degree burns. I had the luxury of being deemed normal for 92% of my life. Others have not been so fortunate! I had to sit back and think about all of the skin conditions that are out there and even physical deformities. People stared at my skin like it was contagious, so I could just imagine how they treated someone who for example may have vitiligo. Before becoming a part of the “different crew”, I assumed it was common sense and plain impolite not to stare at those who were dissimilar. That may have never been taught to them because I witness it everyday now. Although being stared at is now my new norm I cannot think of a way to address the issue in a manner that will find its solution. What I have heard the community say is that they simply try and get used to it. Going to places like the mall, as a new burn survivor, is always a cringe-worthy experience. People would stop and hold the stare for moments! They showed no regard for how they were making me feel. They made no attempt to hide their rude facial expressions. But before I could feel bad for myself, I thought of all the children who had to face that, and I was grateful that I gave the world Lilian. Through her eyes they can safely channel their emotions that they often times bottle up. Through her experiences they can feel less alone and more understood. I wouldn’t want anyone else in my shoes but for a moment I wish they would empathize and say “hey maybe I shouldn’t stare… what if it was me?”

Two Cultures – Best of Both World

My mother was huge and pregnant when she traveled over to the states from Haiti. The creature tumbling in her belly would make an exit three months later in January 1994. As I grew up, I had to adapt to two different societal norms, but my parents were always more prominent. I am positive they were terrified the entire process hoping that their kids wouldn’t be brainwashed in a new country that they knew nothing about. Watching them maneuver as if they were not struggling to adapt gave me all the motivation, I would need to take on the world. I came up with the best principles, morals, and decorum from both my Haitian background and my American culture. That’s why I am certain I will continue to climb up the ladder of success.

Being raised the way I was I had a great balance of a west-Indian upbringing and an American adaptation. My Haitian family instilled things in me that show up in my work over and over again. The strictness I was ruled over with caused me to not fool around with my craft and actually do everything to my best ability. The richness and vibrancy from the island were always in my parents and they decorated our lives with things from their motherland. The colorful stimulation I received fueled my creativity and personality. Life in America was far less challenging in a lot of ways compared to over in Haiti. Even though I didn’t need certain skills, my parents always taught them to my siblings and I in case of an emergency. Knowing more than what would ever be required of me, left me filled with skills that I could always bring out as hidden talents. In both cultures however, I learned about struggle and determination. Americans seemed to be so nonchalant with everything. The life I knew in my home was strict, there was rules, regulations, and a system to always abide by. But when I stepped out of the door, I could do things my own way. No one was waiting to hold your hand or guide you. There were no standards for how you should run your life. The American society had this “do what works for you” attitude and I loved it. The life I wanted to live hung in the balances of the two spectrums and I was honored to be born into two very diverse cultures.

How the Education System Can be Improved

What many people may not know is that I have a degree in Elementary Education. Despite having acquired the degree, I never followed through with the whole Teacher career because I didn’t like the education system. I feel as though the children are not getting the best deal out there but are expected to one day run the world. If the education system stays this way, we are all in trouble. If the people in the high places ever decide to listen to the people actually on ground zero, there might actually be a glimpse of hope. The current approach is unrealistic and clearly not working but from my experience I do have ideas for improvement.

First area of improvement in the education system would have to be testing! My time in the teaching field went something like this: prepare for testing, testing, testing, prepare for more testing, test the testing. The entire curriculum was based on assessments after assessments. Every second there seemed to be a test we had to get the students for. If there is to be any improvement in the school system, they would have to do a dramatic downsize on testing. The amount of pressure on both the teachers and the students to score high on the tests are taking away from them actually having time to learn anything and actually preserve the knowledge. Kids are no longer being taught for their own benefit but rather for numbers and percentiles on a scale.

On the subject of a scale, the pay scale on which teachers’ salaries fall is embarrassing! Teachers would perform better and go the extra mile to educate students if they were not dealing with the emotional strain of not having two pennies to rub together after spending 8 hours in the classroom and another 8 hours after school preparing to do it all over again. Teaching is definitely one of those careers that doesn’t stop when you clock out. Teaching goes home with you and you are never done working. You are given such a demanding task and yet rewarded close to nothing monetarily. I believe raising teacher salaries would improve the education system drastically. The eagerness to fight for the students would be higher and they may actually have a winning chance.

There are a lot of ways the education system could be improved, and I hope one day it is taken seriously and something is done about it. In the meantime, they should focus on the testing and how it hinders teachers from having an effective curriculum, and their wages.

Why I wrote Lilian Is Alright

The book, Lilian is Alright, was created after an incident where a parent of a child burn survivor reached out to me. Her daughter was young and was having a hard time adjusting to her scars. Recalling my own experience as a burn survivor in the beginning stages, I could not even fathom how it may have been if I experienced this as a child. I sympathized with her and my heart tugged at the idea that many other children out there was suffering as well. In further communication with the family I soon came to recognize the similarities in our journeys despite the great age difference. As an aspiring author, I believed this was my call to action!

Writing a piece of literature with the sole purpose of giving children a similar voice, Lilian! Lilian was all young children going through something tragic. I made her character a burn survivor because of who I am, but I felt like her character is inclusive to all children going through a storm. To make sure I was gauging the emotional depth of Lilian’s age properly, I watched the children who were in my classroom at the time. I was teaching third grade and I loved the adult-like maturity majority of them mirrored. I was always pleased to see how they dealt with real life issues and comforted each other when it was needed. I wanted Lilian is Alright to be as realistic as possible.

In the book, Lilian is burned in the same way that I was. I felt it was important to give her something that I could truly write about as far as her injuries. Me being able to relate to the pain she endured from the oil would make the words more impactful. The degree of her burns was also a way of paying homage to myself. Although, I adopted the emotional level from the students, a lot of the cycle Lilian went through was honestly how I felt. Knowing that my feelings can be shared with fellow survivors was even more motivation to complete this book.

I hope to have Lilian is Alright in the hands of survivors in major hospitals. The idea of them being able to see in the midst of their storm that things in the end will be Alright is very comforting. I am honored to know that I play a major role in the recovery of a child. Through the pages of the book I hope they find a reason to smile and move forward.